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Thursday, January 13, 2022

Mother's death

My mother (Marjorie Clare English (née Shanley)) suffered a sudden deterioration in her health early this week and died peacefully today. She had been battling serious health problems for some time, including Parkinson's disease.

For the last ten years of her life she lived in a nursing home where her two sons visited her on a regular basis. My sister, who lives in Western Australia, had to make do with the telephone most of the time but always kept in very close touch. Circumstances were such that my sister's two boys never really got to know their old and (by then) ailing grandmother as well as they would have wished.

This is not the time to write about my mother as a person other than to say that she was deeply loved by her children and other family members, and throughout her life was liked and respected by just about everyone who knew her. I have written in the past about her illness and her fighting spirit, and about the music she liked and responded to. (See "A Parkinson's playlist".)

The family is grateful to Marjorie's physician for her dedication, wisdom and kindness and especially to the hard-working personal care assistants, nurses and others who interacted with her over the last decade. Above all, it was this friendly interaction which kept her going.

11 comments:

  1. There will be no service or ceremony to mark my mother's passing. Feel free to comment here or you may prefer to write to me or one of my siblings privately.

    engmar3 at gmail dot com

    paul-english at hotmail dot com

    kathenglish14 at gmail dot com

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  2. Dear Mark, I had the privilege of knowing my aunt Marj for over 50 years. She has always been one of my favourite persons and someone I looked up to. She had a cheeky and infectious smile and was always interested in people and broader issues. She was particularly in tune with children and very warm and encouraging with them. She had a wonderful and generous spirit and will be greatly missed. Our feelings are with you and the rest of the family.
    Chris

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    1. Thanks Chris, your good wishes are much appreciated. You had a good connection with her.

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  3. So sad to lose a beautiful lady, my lovely aunt who unfortunately, living in different states I did not see as much of as I would have liked, but always loved the times we did catch up as she was a very special lady, my dads little sister. Rest in peace now Auntie Marj
    Cathie

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    1. Thanks Cathie. Your Christmas card was on her bedside table.

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  4. Dear Mark and Paul,
    It was a privilege getting to know you both and your beautiful mother at Mercy Place. We were touched by Marjorie’s resilience, fighting spirit and gentle nature. You demonstrated your loving devotion to her in your daily visits. You both gave your mum your best and she knew it. We’re sure that that’s what kept her fighting just to be with you. You both need to take care of yourselves now as Marjorie rests in peace.
    Love Luigi and Cathy Zappone.

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    1. Thanks very much Cathy and Luigi. I appreciate your empathy and support and I'm sure Paul does too.

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  5. Dear Mark, Paul and Kathy

    I was so sorry to hear of your mother’s passing.

    During our time at MPEM, we got to know each other in our respective support of our parent, and before Covid our evening routines crossed paths most nights. Watching your mother fight her disease with her daily evening walk was inspiring; and while your mother couldn’t speak due to her need to reserve her energy, she always acknowledged my hello with her eyes. Thank you for these photos that show the life she lived.

    You all showed such dedication and love to your mother, and I hope you find some comfort in that.

    Vale Majory; you are now at peace.

    Amanda & Mavis

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    1. Thanks Amanda for your thoughtful comment. Your friendly presence (and that of your always-eccentric mother) helped to humanize the place and make it more like an actual home. Long may Mavis live and flourish!

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    2. Hi Mark and Paul and Kathy. Thank you for letting us know about you mums death. May you all be at peace.It was lovely to read the other tributes. Sounds like she was much loved. Your cousin. Philip English

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    3. Thanks Philip for your kind thoughts.

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